The Rehabilitation of Fullster Makay
Magistrate: "Well Mr Makay? What have you to say for your self. Two watchmen caught you stealing bread rolls from Goodie Parget's stall."
Fullster: "Yes Sir. I did it. I was hungry sir "
Magistate: "Thats no excuse, and you had 2 copper pennies in you pocket when you were taken. That was more than you needed to pay for the bread. - But it is a first offence, and I will be lenient. You will repay Goodie Parget one copper penny as the value of the bread and - what is it to be Goodie Parget? You can either have the same value again, put him in the stocks for the afternoon or send him to the block for a lashing?"
Goodie: "Send him to stocks. Let the other traders see him and mark him, then he won't find it so easy to steal next time ."
3 weeks later ..
Magistrate: "Well, Mr Makey, I see you are back again. This time caught up in brawl at the Fishermans' Arms, eh? And one of the barmen was hurt as he was tried to break it up. Still its not clear who was directly responsible - and they say you were fairly well behaved when you were taken. So again I will be lenient. You will pay 5 copper pieces as compensation for the injury. And Mr Willis will decide the rest of your punishment." Turning to Willis. "Another 5 coppers, the stocks or the lash?"
Willis: "Lash him sir. Let him hurt like I did ."
Magistrate: "Mt Makay. The watch will take you to the town square and you will be lashed twice. Let us hope this shows you the error of your ways . "
A Month later .
Magistrate: "Well, Mr Makey, this is becoming a habit. You were caught red handed climbing out of the window of Master Mariner Simon's house. In your bag the watch found the Master Mariners silver cruet set and some silver knives and forks. A more serious crime. Had it been a first offence I may have chosen the second penalty tariff, - but as you are repeat offender I will apply the third penalty tariff instead. The goods were recovered and returned to the master mariner, but there is the matter of the punishment. Master Mariner, you can select further compensation, of approximately three times the value of the goods, at out estimate 30 silver pennies, of you may send the miscreant to the stocks or lash. In either of the last two cases he will be branded as thief, so he will be easily recognised in future .".
Fullster: "No sir Please not the brand I will go straight ."
Magistrate: "Be quiet Mr Makay, or I will double the tariff ."
Fullster: "Whimper ."
Simons: "I'll take the money, I won't brand a man for that "
Magistrate: "Mr Makey, you are a luck man. You owe Mr Simons you heartfelt thanks. Now do you have the money to pay?"
Fullster: "I can get it Sir! I'll go straight. Honest "
Magistrate: "Mr Makay, I have had enough of your promises. The city will recompense Mt Simons and you will serve time aboard one of her majesty's patrol ships. Your fine will be paid at the standard rate of 1 silver penny per week - so thirty weeks for the fine and another five as compensation for the city."
Fullster: "Nooooo." [as he is dragged away ]
Simons: "Half a year at sea will make a man of him .."
Six weeks later, aboard The Swallow patrol galley
1st Mate: "Thats better Makay. You are pulling that oar well now. A bit more muscle on you and you will be as good as the others
Fullster: "Thank you sir "
Twelve weeks later, still aboard the swallow .
1st Mate: "Quick Makay. Take this belaying pin, if the pirates board us - clobber the first one that comes near. Dont let them get up0 near the drum master "
Fullster: "Aye, Aye sir."
20 minutes later
1st Mate: "Well done Makay. I'm sure you broke the arm of one of those. Now, just put the pin back in its rack .."
Fullster: "Aye Aye sir. We sure showed them didn't we "
17 weeks later
1st Mate: "Thats it Makay. You've done your time now. You can go ashore now if you like. You did better than I thought you would, to be honest. Turned out to be not a bad little rower, and quite handy with a belaying pin too."
Fullster: "Thank you sir. You've been like family to me sir Don't know what I'll do now "
1st Mate: "Then sign up Mr Makay. I will take you on as rower. 1 silver a week and your board. You're bright enough. Just need a bit more discipline and training "
Fullster: "Thank you Sir "